Friday, October 31, 2014

The Tale of Two Days!

Wow! How good a bath feels at the end of a long, busy day! Add a little stress/tension relief bath salts and I am back in business! Haha!

I had the tale of two days today! I had a glorious time with Titus at the Pumpkin Patch! It was the perfect fall day and Titus ate up every moment! I love when I can see my child get fulfillment and his love tank filled! It was glorious!

The rest of the day, not so good! Chase has an ear infection, rushing to get things done, discovering my cat peed on my bathroom mat, getting kids in bed, my brain not working due to lack of sleep, here we are at 11:30 again, blogging!

I have got to get to bed, I have a full day tomorrow, making memories, raising young men, teaching, loving, growing! So, I leave tonight, with one of my favorite quotes that keeps me going, from a very inspiring movie...Finding Nemo as Dori would say "Just keep swimming." That is what I intend to do!

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Wrecking Ball

I feel like I have been hit by a wrecking ball with each obstacle that presents itself in my life! The breathe has been knocked out of me and I don't have the answer. I am up a creek with no paddle! Only the Lord knows my future and what lies in front of me. I am thankful I cannot see the future as there would be more to stress over.

So, I must pull it back together. I cannot lie in agony and frustration. I cannot soak in the fear and uncertainty. But it is certainly not within me to make this adjustment and leap in faith. In my normal human self, I just want to collapse in grief, but that is not what the Lord would call me to do. I won't say I am not in turmoil inside, but I will take my turmoil to the Lord and only He can do the work inside of me to make me right. I am reminded of the song I sang in church growing up, "God will make a way when there seems to be no way, He works in ways we cannot see, He will make a way for me." In this season of my life this song holds more and more meaning. I am thankful. So my focus is to dwell on those words of encouragement and take it all to Him. It is still there, but it is His!

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

On Empty

I'm on a roll, two late nights in a row! Who am I kidding though, I am up late every night! Okay, too much rhyming!

Anyway, My mind is pretty blank as far as deep thoughts go. Feeling a little empty. I am glad to know the one who can fill me up!

After getting back from taking Justice to the after hours urgent care to check on a fever and mouth sores, which turned out to not be serious, but was able to get some mouth cream, I am wiped. On top of that I had a busy day walking life's path with my kids as usual. My goal really is to not take in my stress, not sweating the small things, getting enough rest (which may include a nap tomorrow), basically I need to take care of myself. I need to fill my tank so I can take care of my children and husband. I need to breathe in the Lord and His truth into my life! I am empty, but I know what I need to do to be filled!

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Back to Posting-what I live for!

I am back to posting after a busy weekend! Yes, it is in fact 11:20 p.m. Monday night after Justice's last football game. Having gotten the little athlete off to bed not long ago after helping him recover from being sad football is over and cranky over the littlest issue. Boys can have drama too let me tell you! Bless him!

So, this will be short and sweet needless to say! I live for my children! I mean I really live for them! This is the life the Lord has blessed me with and I live to do His will and His will for me is them! Before I go to bed each night I look on my kids as they sleep. There is NOTHING more precious to me, than seeing my sleeping babies (and yes, my 9 year old is my baby). I live to make their memories. I am so ready to go to the Pumpkin Patch on Thursday with Titus! Taking the boys to the trunk or treat was so fulfilling just seeing them drink in the moment! Each one of my boys are so different, unique and special in their own ways and I treasure their God given abilities, gifts and personalities! So, my focus for today is to continue to treasure them! They are what I live for! This is what I live for!

Saturday, October 25, 2014

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Hope In Front of Me

The focus of my post for today came from my drive to Kroger at 9:30 pm last night. While enjoying a peaceful drive to the store following a very rushed bedtime, my current favorite song came on the radio "Hope in Front of Me" by former American Idol contestant Danny Gokey. It is a song about going through dark places in life and remaining hopeful with the Lord by your side. I am in a time of survival right now. Life is busy with four children no doubt and Ron is working so much that I am overwhelmed by all that is one my plate. I am not doing all that much outside the home, just maintaining our home life is all consuming. I am tired! I am stretched beyond my limits, beyond my abilities, beyond my strength. For today, I am choosing to focus on hope. I love the prevailing theme in "The Hunger Games" book series that hope if powerful. The books do not give the true source of hope coming from the Lord and that is really what makes hope so powerful. Although, these days seem so dark and life is so trying, I choose to hope in the Lord. I see hope in my children, playing puppets with Liam and Chase at the library, Titus getting all E's on his report card, seeing the joy and fulfillment in Justice as he plays football, hope is truly in front of me. I struggle though feeling powerless to meet the expectations of myself, hitting walls in the world, and feeling uncertain about the future. My house is messy, I get my children to bed too late, I forget things, I am not as productive as I would like to be, the list goes on and on. But, I have hope! Instead of dwelling on my weaknesses and shortcomings, I am choosing to focus on hope. I really have to, because if the frustrations and stress get to me I am not doing anybody any good and that includes my children. Mommy can't be what they need me to be if I am self focused, living in pity and doubt. Hope carries me! His hope carries me! My hope is in the Lord!

"'The Lord is my portion' says my soul, 'therefore I will hope in Him.'" Lamentations 3:24

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Focus

I have decided to take back up blogging. Many years ago I started my blog in the hopes to record memories and stories from motherhood when my first son Justice was born. Blogging was a new phenomenon and I was excited to enter that world. But, as time passed and life got busier as more boys were born in our lives, I got away from posting. So, I had thought about picking it up for some months now and am diving back in. My goal will be to post once a day. In thinking about the direction I want to go I felt the Lord leading me to center my posts related to a focus point for each day of my life and share about what I am doing to reach that goal. Focus points will be for any area of my life (motherhood, Christian walk, autism, health, stress, church, marriage, my online business, homeschooling, etc.)

For today, I am starting with the idea of being a pioneer. In history, Justice is learning about Daniel Boone, an early American Pioneer noted for clearing a trail to Kentucky. Daniel Boone faced many hardships including losing his brother, being kidnapped, hunger, and uncertainty. I love how the history book we have promotes the lessons we can learn about these historical figures. I know Justice is learning valuable life lessons, but I am also gaining insights and looking deeper into my own life from what these men in women did. In reading about Daniel Boone, as a pioneer he blazed a trail for others to follow. As a mother, I am blazing a trail for my children to follow. It is an immense responsibility that I have in the lives of my children. So, for today, I am thinking about how I am being a pioneer for the little boys God has given me from the simplest of actions and for the deep conversations, showing them the way to Christ and how we can live our lives for Him.

“Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it” (Proverbs 22:6)