The focus of my post for today came from my drive to Kroger at 9:30 pm last night. While enjoying a peaceful drive to the store following a very rushed bedtime, my current favorite song came on the radio "Hope in Front of Me" by former American Idol contestant Danny Gokey. It is a song about going through dark places in life and remaining hopeful with the Lord by your side. I am in a time of survival right now. Life is busy with four children no doubt and Ron is working so much that I am overwhelmed by all that is one my plate. I am not doing all that much outside the home, just maintaining our home life is all consuming. I am tired! I am stretched beyond my limits, beyond my abilities, beyond my strength. For today, I am choosing to focus on hope. I love the prevailing theme in "The Hunger Games" book series that hope if powerful. The books do not give the true source of hope coming from the Lord and that is really what makes hope so powerful. Although, these days seem so dark and life is so trying, I choose to hope in the Lord. I see hope in my children, playing puppets with Liam and Chase at the library, Titus getting all E's on his report card, seeing the joy and fulfillment in Justice as he plays football, hope is truly in front of me. I struggle though feeling powerless to meet the expectations of myself, hitting walls in the world, and feeling uncertain about the future. My house is messy, I get my children to bed too late, I forget things, I am not as productive as I would like to be, the list goes on and on. But, I have hope! Instead of dwelling on my weaknesses and shortcomings, I am choosing to focus on hope. I really have to, because if the frustrations and stress get to me I am not doing anybody any good and that includes my children. Mommy can't be what they need me to be if I am self focused, living in pity and doubt. Hope carries me! His hope carries me! My hope is in the Lord!
"'The Lord is my portion' says my soul, 'therefore I will hope in Him.'" Lamentations 3:24
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